![]() ![]() I foreclosed on a bunch of other identities in favor of being a violinist. ![]() I 100% experienced identity foreclosure as a kid. That sort of reminds me of where we are politically, where people have foreclosed on an identity and that the idea of adjusting is super threatening. That one change is entangled with so many other parts of who we are. It's just a cleaner narrative, and what we're forgetting when we do that is that we are really complex systems that are operating in even more complex ecosystems, which means that when you tweak one part of yourself, necessarily a bunch of other stuff is gonna get affected, right? In fact, in many ways, this observation was the inspiration for my podcast, "A Slight Change of Plans," which is all about marrying the science and storytelling to try to understand how it is that people respond to change, but one thing that I found is we tend to code changes at their outset as being good or bad. We're very bad at predicting the ways that big changes will change us. So can you talk about our ability to predict what will make us happy? Like, I think there was a comparison between having cancer or breaking a leg, and breaking a leg is actually much more trying for most people. We think that one thing is going to ruin our lives, but it's actually something much smaller. That I think he won the Nobel for it, which is that we're terrible cognitive forecasters. One of my favorite ideas from Daniel Kahneman. I'm Kelly Corrigan, this is "Tell Me More," and here's my conversation with podcaster, scientist, Rhodes Scholar, and every bit her mother's daughter Maya Shankar. This is a conversation about hard endings, astonishing beginnings, and the chutzpah it often takes to transition from one moment in our lives to the next. To learn more, listen to the latest episode of “ It’s a Good Life”.♪ As a 9-year-old, prodded by her mother, Maya Shankar walked into Juilliard unannounced and played her violin for whoever would listen, kicking off a period of study that included private lessons with one of the world's most esteemed musicians.Īs a 26-year-old, her music career cut short by injury, Maya cold called the White House to offer her services as a cognitive scientist. Do this and you’ll become more resilient and you’ll experience growth, too. Maya Shankar said, “Change in one area of our lives can often have profound spill-over effects into other areas of our lives that we simply can’t predict at the outset.” The key to positively handling change is to avoid labeling it as simply ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and instead to try to approach it with humility and an open mind. But, over time, it’s possible to cultivate a mindset that, instead of running away from uncertainty and change, you pride yourself as the type of person who can thrive in it.Īs Dr. Things won’t happen overnight of course – you can’t just give yourself a label and transform your personality. To alter your relationship with change, try to identify yourself as someone who excels during times of uncertainty, blossoms when encountering challenge and flourishes in the face of ambiguity. You should also look to other people’s experiences and mine wisdom from their stories, even if they aren’t exactly like yours.Ĭhange your relationship with uncertaintyĪs humans, we tend to dislike uncertainty, but it is possible to build a stronger identity with it. Instead, look back on your life and remember how you navigated all types of change in the past. It’s important to remember, however, that even if the specifics of the moment are unprecedented, you’ve done this rodeo many times, just by virtue of being human! You don’t have to go through a particular experience to know how to respond to it. What is it about a certain pursuit that you enjoy? What lights you up? What propels you forward? If you can figure out what really makes you tick, you’ll discover where else in your life you can express that.ĭealing with change can often feel intimidating. Instead, work to uncover where your true passion lies. ![]() To better adapt to life’s changes, you shouldn’t exclusively attach your identity to a single pursuit, such as sports or music. People often foreclose on their identity prematurely, without ever having fully explored other ways they could be. Maya Shankar about how a change of plan affects us and who we become when we encounter it. I recently interviewed cognitive scientist and podcast host Dr. Not everything in life will always go according to plan, but that doesn’t have to be a negative thing.
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